Some people wait an entire lifetime to find the person that they will end up with. Some people dedicate life in their twenties to discovering who they are and who they want to be. Some people focus on a career, on travel, on fun, on risks, on just being a young adult. I get to do all of those things as well, except I get to do it with the man of my dreams. I was only 22 when I got married. Many people say that is too young. Trust me, I’ve heard all the questions and all the concerns:
don’t you want to date around some more and see what’s out there… don’t you want to focus on your own life and experience what the world has to offer before settling down… don’t you want to grow as an individual before committing yourself to another person? Simply, the answer is, and always has been, no. Don’t get me wrong, I completely understand where people who questioned my decisions were coming from. I realize that my situation is unusual, and I realize that it can be hard to understand. I do not think that everyone should be expected to marry as young as I did. Everyone’s journey is different.
However, I know that the plan God has for me included getting married at a young age. In my heart, I always knew that I would get married young. Even before I met my husband. Those feelings were only justified when I did meet Connor at the age of sixteen. Sometimes, God presents part of His plan to you, and you just know. Anyone who knew my husband and I in high school knew that we were attached at the hip. We did everything together, and we absolutely hated being apart. A lot of high school couples are like this, but I think we were a little extreme. After high school, Connor went away to West Point, and we began four years of a long-distance love. But even still, we did not want to date around, and we continued to make individual sacrifices for one another and our life together. This is the case for every successful military relationship, which explains why getting married at a young age is not unusual in the military world. Having faith in God’s plan and in love is sometimes the only thing that can get us through.
Throughout our relationship, I came across many articles about marrying young. Some articles encouraged young marriages, while others focused on the benefits of waiting to get married until a bit later in life. I read both with an open heart, but I was drawn towards the articles praising young marriage; those were the points that I was more in sync with. Throughout our long-distance relationship, I knew that I was waiting for my husband.
The articles I read made many points about the benefits of young married life. Some of them made more sense to me than others, and I even formulated other points in my head. This is my own list of why I believe getting married in my early twenties was the best thing that has happened to me, and one of the best parts of God’s plan for me.
I get to grow and build a life with my husband. My husband and I began our relationship in high school, so we truly have grown up together. We molded our lifestyles, our passions, and our dreams to those of each another. Throughout our lifetime, we get to further build on those together, while constantly supporting each other.
Life is short, and now I get to spend more of it with the love of my life. The greatest blessing in my life is that I get to spend most of it with an incredible man who I love with all my heart. We don’t have to wait around for someone to share a life with, because we already have a life together. I cannot imagine having to wait until my late twenties or thirties to meet the love of my life. Seriously, life is short, and I feel so blessed that I only lived sixteen years without my husband.
We get to experience life’s journey together. Yes I want to travel, yes I want to experience other cultures, yes I want to do all the things that my twenty-something peers are doing. But the best part is, I will do all those things and I will get to enjoy them with my best friend. All of the experiences that we together are contributing to the growth of our life.
I get to share the joys and trials that my soldier faces. I am blessed with the ability to be there for my husband. And that is quite time consuming when your husband is both in the army and in medical school. I am there to pick him up from the airport when he comes home from weeks of training. I am there to drop off his uniform when he accidentally wears the wrong one to work. I make sure that he sets aside time for dinner when he’s overwhelmed with tests and labs. I get to hold his hand when he is in uniform and feel the pride that comes with knowing the many ways God is working through my husband.
God has a plan for us. Regardless of what some people tried to tell us throughout our relationship, we knew that God made our hearts for one another. We knew that we were destined to build a life together. That feeling is powerful, especially with the understanding that God’s plan was for us to become one.
We are in love. This one does not need much explanation. We fell in love and knew that we did not want to spend our lives without each other. We experienced first hand how true love can withstand both incredible time and distance. That is the love that we are building our marriage on. We continue to build our life together as we fall in love with each other every day.
My husband makes me the best version of myself. I am blessed by my husband because of the person he makes me. He supports me, encourages me, and inspires me to become my better self. And I do the same for him. My husband filled my life with a purpose greater than just myself. I have someone to take care of, to share my life with, to build dreams with, and to love unconditionally.